My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
