Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
