he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize