i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
