But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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