At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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