actually, I'm a sock model
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
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