You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
So apparently I’m into choking now
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize