belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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