is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
