Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
