Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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