finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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