So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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