Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
