Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize