STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
