Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize
