youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
