Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
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