I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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