3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
It was confusing and full of hummus
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
