you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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