i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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