Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
