I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
two words...techno handjob
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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