If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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