if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
