Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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