the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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