so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
