Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Randomize
