come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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