I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
