Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
This is the high leading the old right now
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
