She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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