ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
