Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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