I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
smell my finger.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
