i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
