Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
