pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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