Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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