Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
