I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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