am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
