i jhust puked up my retainher.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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