I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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