It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
She needs sedatives and a leash
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
