Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
