i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
