drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
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